lighttruck.jpg

The DC police parked a light truck on our street throughout early December. (Note: by “light truck” I do not mean the category of SUVs and other vehicles that do not have to meet the most stringent fuel economy standards in the new energy bill. I mean a generator with humongous lights on it. It looks nothing like this picture, but wouldn’t it be great if it did?)
The police bring the truck in and shine its big lights on the street to deter crime. It seems people are less likely to shoot eachother when under huge spotlights. I think it “worked,” in that there was no major crime during the light truck’s stay on our street, as far as I know. But I don’t know that it helped actually solve any problems. (Although, hey, what if we put light trucks on every street? Would there be world peace and harmony?)

It seems the light truck also scared off two potential buyers of my neighbor’s houses. Said neighbors told me that some people had a contract on the house, but then pulled out when they saw the light truck.

Potential buyers, are you still out there? Come back. Our street is nice! The light truck is your friend. It’s a holiday light truck! If the bright lights shine through your blinds and curtains, never fear — you can just tape brown paper shopping bags to your windows to help you slumber. Or who needs sleep when you can go out and celebrate under those big crime-busting lights? They are kind of like film lights, so you can feel like you are on a movie set right here on your own street! And when the blue police lights bounce around and fill the windows of the houses on the narrow street with their glow, it’s like a disco party! You can go out in the street and dance in front of the light truck. Your husband may say, “You look drunk,” but the police will take no mind. Embrace the light truck.

Advertisements