I received six holiday greeting cards at work. Four of them are from ocean researchers or groups. One is from a hunting group that mercifully spared me of a picture of a fish carcass wearing a Santa hat (although, come to think of it, that would be pretty funny — perhaps next year?).  The other is from the crazy libertarians. I would like to thank all of these groups, especially the generous card-giving ocean people, for their holiday cheer. Happy ninth day of Christmas!


Perhaps some of you have seen the news that has that has gone out like a shot heard ’round the world about Paris Hilton and her big fat charitable concerns for drunk elephants. (I know you’re saying: “well, at least the elephants don’t drive, like certain drunken celebrities we know.”)

It was a lovely little gem of a tale: a celebrity, an odd cause and crazy animal antics — what more could you ask for?

The truth, people — that is what you could ask for. And the AP wasn’t giving it to you, according to Hilton’s publicist.

It turns out the story was completely wrong. Like all wrong. Paris never said anything about the pachyderms, according to her people. Now we need some “responsible” journalism to follow up on why she doesn’t care about them and their drunk elephantine butts after all.